Rock Bottom

My knees contacted with rocky ground.
I fell to my face. Blood oozed from cuts on my arms.
The fall had been a long one. Every bone in my body told me so.
I vaguely remembered things I had passed during my fall.
Memories.
Memories that hurt.
I tried to call for help, but my voice cracked and filled with dust.
I tried to lift myself to my feet, but no strength remained.
Why was I here? Could I get out?
Could it get worse?
A stench. My own body putting off an odor so bad I gagged.
A cry of anguish. My cry of anguish.
Alone.
Alone?
No.
Somewhere from below a voice called my name.
A sickening voice.
A voice of darkness.
Could I possibly fall father towards that voice?
I shuddered.
I tried to block out the voice, but how tempting it began to sound.
I wanted to resist.
But I had no strength.
A thought crossed my mind.
A silly thought.
Why would I ever look up?
I didn't even know if I had the strength to.
But somehow, I did.
Using every ounce of energy I had left, I lifted my head and looked up.
A hand.
A hand was reaching out.
For me.
Where had that come from?
I reached out and took hold of the hand.
The voice of darkness shrieked in pain below me.
The hand held my own firmly.
A new strength filled my bones.
The hand began to pull me out.
And with every moment that passed, my strength grew.
Memories began to fade.
The only thing that mattered now was the one who's hand had helped me.
My feet touched soft grass.
I looked at my arms.
My wounds had turned to scars.
Scars I knew would heal if only I kept reaching for that hand.
Reaching for Christ.
How long had that hand been there?
Somehow I knew it had been there all along.
Waiting.
Patiently waiting for me to look up.
A hand that is there right now.
Reaching out towards you.
Will you look up?



     Philippians 3:12-14, "But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

No. Really. It's how I cook.

As you can see... I can't cook... at all. :D

CookingWithClari - Peach Cobbler?

Pray You Through

     I stumbled across this song and just had to share it. :)
     So often we have friends who we want to help so bad - but there's nothing we can do.
     Except pray.
     This song really was powerful to me.
     We are called, as Christians to pray for others. To thank God for those who are following Christ, to pray for those who aren't.
     The most powerful thing we can do to help someone is prayer.
     And I've seen prayers answered. Big ones.
     Just an example - a few months back God really impressed on my heart to pray for a friend. I prayed all through that day whenever I thought about it for this friend. But I still felt the intense need to continue praying. I got another friend to pray with me and spent the next day fasting and praying. I was sitting in a room, reading the Bible and praying that afternoon, when I felt this overwhelming peace wash over me. And I felt God say, "I am in control. This friend is in my hands and I have a plan for them." The intense need for prayer for this friend left(of course I'm not saying that there was no need to pray for them anymore. Everyone needs prayer.). A week later I found out this friend had kinda what you could say a life-changing moment and felt closer to God to ever before. Praise God!
     Prayer is a powerful thing. It really is.
     Talking to the God who CREATED you. Opening your heart to Him. Crying out to Him. I mean it's ....wow. Most people seem to take prayer for granted. To "do it" just because the Bible says to pray. So before they go to bed, before they eat a meal, they'll just say a quick prayer. We should be praying because we are talking to our CREATOR. Our Heavenly Father. We should be constantly praying. Constantly seeking Christ.
     2 Chronicles 7:14, "If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land."
     Do you have a friend who is falling away? Who is going through a hard time? Who just needs comfort? The best thing you can do for them is pray. Pray for their salvation if they aren't saved. Pray for God to reveal Himself to them if it be His will.
      Pray. 
      Pray not out of habit. But out of love for Christ. Out of the desire to seek Him. Pray from your heart to a God who loves you.
     Pray because we are called to pray. Not forced. Called.

News Report!

My computer being down doesn't stop me from filming and editing videos. :)
(Filmed and edited on ipod touch)

His will. His will. His will. Not mine.

     Today is really not going well for me. At all.
     My computer crashed and we took it to the mac store - my harddrive is dead. My files aren't backed up. It's gunna cost at minimum $400 to retrieve the files.
     Our internet service is trash. It crashes sometimes literally ever 30 seconds... we've been on the phone twice with them...both phone calls over 3 hours and produced nothing. They aren't fully honest. Finally we have a service person coming out to look at our internet.
     But even in all this - God is in control. He knows what's going on.
     It's really hard to imagine why in the world he would let something like this happen.
     My files are a really big deal to me, specially since photography is what I do. All my photos-possibly gone.
     But I know I need to remember, God is in control. And these are just things of this world. They're going to burn up anyways. They aren't eternal.
     1 John 2:15, "Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him."
     Psalm has a lot of awesome verses about God always being with us. Psalm 136 is one of my favorite passages (post on it here) The same God who help David defeat Goliath - is in control of this situation. The same God who defeated armies with only a few men - is in control of this situation. Wow. I mean big WOW.
God gives, God takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord. -In EVERY situation. Even losing files and internet. I mean those are NOTHING. Those are nothing.
     I've got Christ in my life. That's all I need.

Truck Story

This is a song I wrote about...2 or 3 years ago I think.
Based of Taylor Swift's "Love Story" ;)
enjoy! :D

Truck Story

I was so green when I first met you,

I rub my eyes,
and the flashback starts,
I recycled,
In the summer air I recycled.


See the world.
See the paper. We re-use.
See I make my way through the crowd,

Say re-use! Little did I know.


That I was so naive. I was wasting my life,
And my parents said stay away from environment,
And i was crying, without a savings,
begging you, please, save the trees I said.

Forever I would recycle, until that day,
I was waiting for the world to melt before me,
I'd save the trees and I'd save the hot bees,
It's a green story, feel the breeze.

So I put on a jacket, cuz then I saw,
The world ain't gunna melt before my eyes,
So get your cash,
And we'll go buy a big diesel truck.


Cuz I was so naive, I was wasting my life,

And my parents said stay away from environment,
But you were everything to me,
I was begging you, please save the trees I said.


Forever we would recycle. Until that day,

I was waiting, for the world to melt away,
I'd said save the trees and I'd said save the hot bees,
It's a green story, it comes like fleas.


Oh diesel save me, they're tryin' to tell me what to buy,

This love is difficult, but it's real,
DOn't be afraid, no smart car for me. Oh no.
It's a truck story, diesel how you flow.
Oh oh


I got tired og going green,

floudnering in a world that was alaskan bound,
my faith in you ain't fading,
when I drive you on the outskirts of town, and I said,


Diesel truck save me. I've been feeling so alone.

I kept waiting for a smart car, that didn't run.
It was in my head. I didn't know what to think.
You came around and saved me. What joy you bring.


And I need you diesel truck.

I'll never have to be alone.
I need you and that's all I really know.
I pulled out some cash, so now I can buy you.
IT's a truck story, diesel just say yes.

oh oh
oh oh
Cuz i was so green what I first saw you...

Some posts are hard to write...

This is one of those. Hard because it's sad, and it's true.
You may have seen my post I made about the suicide. (You can see it here) But I wanted to make another post, with some more details on what happened.


     Some things come as a shock. And when you reach those moments you don't know quite what to do. Eight days ago Rachel came into my room and by the look on her face I knew something was seriously wrong. She asked me if I could handle some really bad news. Then she told me she had just gotten off the phone with out Aunt and that Sarah, the girl we work with each year selling plants at my Aunt's house, had likely committed suicide.
     I felt like someone had punched me. Hard.
     Rachel went on to say that she had been missed for over 3 hours and there was evidence on her computer that she was planning to kill herself.
     One moment life can seem just fine. The next you can feel like your whole world just crashed in on you.
     I was awake most the night, praying and hoping.
     The next day brought the news no one wanted to hear; They found her and she had killed herself.
     For the next few days nothing seemed to matter to me. I just kept thinking about Sarah.
     Hadn't it just been a month ago I had worked with her? Never would I have guessed that was was going to commit suicide.
     She wasn't saved, nor is any of her family.
     It hurt when I heard it happen. It still hurts.In the blink of an eye your whole life can change.
     Some things come as a shock.
     Some things come as a blow.
     And some, change your life forever.
(http://www.columbian.com/news/2011/jun/28/body-found-on-round-lake-in-lacamas-park/)